What would you do?

You see them all the time. Standing on corners at intersections, squating on the ground, leaning up against buildings, asking for handouts, holding signs that say need food, will work for food, or more honestly - need a drink.

Sometimes I help, sometimes I don't. Not sure what the criteria is that helps me determine who to help & who to pass by. But after a quick assesment, which usually involves a tugging in my heart, I will either help or pass on by.

A couple of Saturday's ago was no different.

I went to McDonald's to pick up something for David & his Dad. It was supposed to be a quick trip there & back. But traffic was heavy & the drive thru really busy. As I waited my turn in line there was a young man, dirty and tired looking, leaning up against the wall. He wore a cap, sandles and had a blanket tied around his shoulders. His sleeping bag was rolled up neatly next to him and all his belongings were in a bag that was tucked protectively under his arm. In his hands he was holding a piece of card board that simply said "need food".

I took all of this in, while trying desperately NOT to make eye contact. That's always the worst thing about these situations. Don't make eye contact until you have made up your mind what you are going to do.

I searched in my purse and the most I could come up with was a couple of quarters, a dime and a few pennies. It wouldn't buy him a cup of cofee at Quick Trip much less a hamburger. Thankfully the cars in front of me began to move and he was soon out of my sight. But not out of my thoughts. Oh how I hate that. What to do, what to do.

I decided the most logical thing was to buy him something to eat. So I circled back around and pulled over & asked if he wanted something to eat. He said he had just had something so I gave him the change and I really meant to drive off. But he looked so pitiful and so cold sitting there with that vacant look that I just wanted to do so much more for him but at the same time knowing full well that there really was very little that I could do for him. So I asked him if he needed anything else. He thought for a minute than said "you know it is really cold and what I could use is some warm pants". "OK, I can do that!! I'll just run home & drop these McChickens off & I'll get you some warm pants & be right back." But then he surprised me and asked if he could go along. We'll OK I said.

It became apparent after talking to him for a few minutes that he was probably mentally ill. Don't know if he had always been that way or if drugs had created it. But it didn't matter. He was from Nevada, but hadn't lived there in a long time. He needed a job but didn't have an ID.

I took him to look at clothes but he didn't find anything that would work for him. When we dropped him off I tried to talk him into going to a shelter but he said those don't really work for him. We gave him some money and I gave him my phone number & left him at the McDonalds

The next Friday evening the phone rings and it's him. He says he's lost his sleeping bag and it's cold could we maybe help him a little. We remember David has an old coat in the closet so we grab that on our way out to Walmart to buy a sleeping bag.

We meet him at the designated spot & he is cleaned up from the first time I met him. He is now wearing blue sweat pants that are several sizes too small. He seems appreciative. We try again to get him to go to a shelter but he can't bear to do that.

There is so little that you can do for someone like him. Trying to help with his most basic needs just doesn't seem to be enough. But that is because I'm imposing my basic needs on to him. In my world, basic needs include the security of knowing that what I have today will be there tomorrow. In his world, basic needs are whatever he needs at that moment - a sleeping bag, a warm coat. The security of knowing that he will have those things when he wakes up is as foreign to him as living on the streets is to me.

I wish I could do more.